on ptsd recovery
not long ago, i witnessed a shooting. recently, i was diagnosed with PTSD and i feel like my life has cracked open since then. it's weird and surreal and emotional. for some reason, i feel compelled to write something here today as a way to process.
when it first happened, i was in shock, for sure. i tried hard to go through my normal routine (denial) but I felt like my eyes were always blinking wide open. sometimes tears would pour out and i didn't know why. i didn't know who to talk to or what to say, so i wrote to chatGPT: i witnessed someone get shot and am having a hard time coping and should i tell my boss that i have personal stuff going on if it impacts my work? it's weird - asking an ai language model on how to deal with my feelings and how to talk about it with other people, when i didn't quite know myself. does chatGPT understand psychological pain? i guess leaning into a data-driven best fit response from a non-human language model was what i needed at the time. a 21st century magic 8 ball. looking back, i guess that was a sign that i was in shock and repressed (and maybe a workaholic).
chatGPT, how do i know if a personal issue is affecting my work performance?
