ices and vices
almost every online personality test i've taken tells me i'm secretive and withdrawn, like gollum. a recent one i took ascribed me to ice and most compatible with poison. lol. i feel like i'm a warm person but perhaps just let out steam at a trickling pace.
i'm a very quiet person - a trait that has mostly plagued me my whole life. sure, there's the whole aura of mystery thing but for the most part, i don't feel the world favors the quiet. i've always been perplexed with the importance of words, especially spoken. being quiet is almost a vice. silence maintains the deliciousness of solitude. once i speak or converse about my inner thoughts, there's an invasion on those pleasures of privacy.
it also means that i am alone, though.
recently, i've started to warm to the idea of letting go of parts of my solitude and wielding my voice to connect with others and strike a better balance. i've been practicing speaking and writing more and i'm mostly surprised by what comes out. i'm not sure if my words quite feel like a representation of myself - it's still someone separate. but perhaps i just need to keep practicing.